This summer there’s been a lot of talk about alcohol, and we’d like to continue the conversation because, hey, it’s 5 o’clock somewhere.
Bars serving minors, bros icing bros and the unfortunate alleged incident of a drunken senator have made us question if all the money used on public awareness for the effects of alcohol has been well spent.
All right, so we know those public service announcements are an utter joke and a waste of money, but the aforementioned situations make us worry, especially seeing as how the fall semester is near.
You’ve heard it plenty of times before from your parents, teachers, brochures galore and probably from this paper at some point or another, but seriously, bro, don’t drink and drive.
Drinking and driving is perhaps one of the most selfish things one can do.
You’re putting your own life at risk (because we’re sure there’s someone out there who doesn’t want to see you kick the bucket just yet), and you’re putting the lives of those driving in the vicinity of you at risk.
Granted, when you’re under the influence, these things don’t necessarily cross your mind, hence that whole “impaired judgment” thing.
Planning ahead can circumvent any bad calls, though. A little strategy and some forward thinking can go a long way.
Before going out, you and your friends can draw straws to see who will be the designated driver or just introduce a rotation: Each week a different friend steps up.
Add it to the sacred friend code if you must.
And if you all slip up and end up using those straws to sip your fruity cocktails, call a cab.
Calling a cab also works for the lone wolf.
As you’re lying face down on the bar, attempting to figure out just how you’re going to get up from the bar stool, try to muster enough drunken slurred words to ask the bartender to call a cab, if he or she hasn’t already done so at that point.
Yes, cab fare adds up, but compare that to the very real cost of a DUI: insurance, court fees, classes and lawyers.
By then, when all is said and done, you’re looking at about $20,000 worth of fees, all in the name of getting hammered.
Not to mention the cost of potentially getting kicked out of school or losing your job as a result of a DUI.
And of course nothing beats a house party.
It’s cheaper than going out, and if everyone brings a pillow, they can just crash at your pad and stain your carpets with various bodily fluids.
Even a lost security deposit or steam cleaner rental is less than the cost of a DUI.
In times of economic hardship, there’s really no need to burden your wallet with the cost of a DUI.
Still not convinced? Try www.textataxi.com, change your Facebook to “someone come get me at [insert bar name] because I’m messed up beyond all recognition,” or just pass out in an alley somewhere.
It will make for a hilarious story later.
There are just so many options and alternatives that make it so easy to not drink and drive. It’s hard to fathom why someone would do so.
If you’re that lazy and irresponsible, then perhaps drinking isn’t for you.
Despite the typical American attitude toward drinking, drinking doesn’t always have to be about getting wasted beyond belief. Alcohol can be a means to simply wind down, relax and have some fun with friends.
In other words, it’s OK to drink without getting incredibly drunk.
If all these options aren’t for you, we hear there are plenty of nice people at those Alcoholic Anonymous meetings.
So, before you head out to the bar, ask yourself: “How can I not be a drunken fool tonight?”
Your friends, family and future self will thank you for it.
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